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Dating Takes Time—5 Tips to Fit Dating into Your Life
girl looking at menu and eating alone

Life gets rather busy and can go by in a flash. Work full time. Exercise daily. Visit your family. Socialize with your friends. Do all the adulting things. Drink water. Get eight hours of sleep. Don’t forget to take some personal time.

Fitting all that into a week, let alone a day, can be overwhelming. Now adding dating into that mix can sometimes feel like an impossible feat. Here are some tips to consider when you’re feeling too busy for dating.

Plan Ahead

Busy people tend to use a calendar to keep track of events, whether a physical planner or a phone calendar app. We plan appointments, meetings, events, and sometimes even rest breaks. Why not plan dating time into your schedule? Committing some time, even if it’s only a half hour to an hour a week, devoted to dating activity, it’s a great start to making it a priority and holding yourself accountable. Having a dedicated time and day each week can also alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty that comes with dating.

Keep It Crystal Clear

You’re busy. Dating takes time. Before you jump in, think about what you are looking for in your partner, relationship, and life in general. Knowing these things will help you navigate this process easier. When going on dates or starting a relationship, make your intentions clear at the start. Be mindful of what you are bringing to the table, what you can provide, and especially what you can’t if the timing isn’t quite right. Your dates will likely appreciate openness and honesty. Who knows, maybe they are just as busy and need that channel of communication open as well.

Phone A Friend

So you tell yourself you want to tackle dating but keep finding it on the back burner. Share this goal of yours with your friends. Rally your squad to cheer you along! Have them keep you accountable to make space for dating, whatever that looks like for you and your schedule. Also, use them for support if the dating process isn’t moving as picture-perfect as you would like. Bringing friends into the mix might open doors to new connections you might not have found otherwise. Who knows what single friends your friends might have!

Trial Dating Apps

Dating apps don’t always have the best reputation, but they can be a great option for the busy person on the go. You can “mingle” at your convenience, anywhere you choose. Have a free five minutes in your schedule? Pop open that app and make a few connections. Making it even more convenient, you can set parameters that weed out things you are not interested in. If the vibe is there, you can schedule an in-person meetup off the app. If you make a match with someone but aren’t feeling the vibe, you can end that connection without ever needing to meet up formally.

Take A Look In The Mirror

Now before you cue the T. Swift “Hi, I’m the problem, it’s me” background music, hear this out. Most everyone is taught or picks up on these social norms that say you must get married by a certain age. But you aren’t obligated to follow them. Maybe, it’s worth looking deep inside to see what you really want.

Are you struggling to fit dating into your schedule because it simply isn’t the top priority at this point? If so, that’s completely ok. When the time is right, it will make sense! Remember, you are allowed to move at your own pace and do what feels right for you. If you’re finding dating difficult to manage, contact me to see how relationship counseling can offer you some extra help!

Therapy with Shanni

Offering Virtual Therapy Throughout New York and In Person Therapy on the Upper West Side, NYC.

110 W96th St Suite 1D, New York, NY 10025 (Tuesdays & Fridays)
Call: (347) 631 8350
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